why re-LIE to yourself!? (2012 edition)

why re-LIE to yourself!? (2012 edition).......now the title of my blog post is named thus as each and every year we -or more namely and honestly I- are subjected to peoples frivolous attempts in which they claim to "change what needs changing!" and even more ANNOYINGLY spout "20.. will be my year!"


come on now....lets stop kidding yourself... because if you think that the change of  'A' singular date in your life would then be the catalyst you needed to change or remove that thing you knew should have been removed from your life already you are even more foolhardy than you have ultimately failed to have grasped!!


not trying to shoot down peoples parade and all but when I hear or read people say things like "this is my year" etc. I just think plain and simply (two words).....SAVE IT!
i mean all the time people spend saying "I'm going to do this..." or "next year I start fresh by stopping this .." etc. the one re-occurring thought that travels through my head is 


WHY ARE YOU NOT DOING SOMETHING ABOUT IT RIGHT NOW!
and that's complimented by the thought
IF YOU PUT THE WHEELS IN MOTION NOW YOU WOULDN'T HAVE TO START THE YEAR 'DRY' AND THINGS WOULD PROBABLY RUN A LITTLE BIT 'SMOOTHER' FOR YOU COME THE TURN OF THE YEAR!


But then again there are a few of us that prey upon feigned ignorance and use that to put off doing the things that should be done. Some might read this and think who am I to question motives like such but if you look carefully its not the motive but rather the intent or even more so the 'will' behind to do so as having a weak will is what derails a lot of us in things that we 'plan' to do!


to keep this one short I think a lot of people should look upon themselves and think about this 'delaying behaviours/habits' that they have and assess how truly detrimental they are to their own growth and stability in life. I do feel that by focusing our energies on finding solutions here and now we would then move on to eliminating a great deal of hindrances and removing a few of the obstacles that we allow to creep up upon us by putting things off until the new year. I know this Blog post comes a little late especially as its now the last day of the year but if anything id like this Blog post to at the least get your minds thinking into what you have planned for next year but more importantly to act upon them NOW -if possible- rather than even tommorow as generally we can make these traditional resolutions but fail to start them so my thinking is if its already started then it will be easier to keep up come the new year.


I would however would like to close wishing all a happy new year and that you remain strong, focused and determined to out do all plans made for the up coming year,sending my blessings to all, chris :)

Tis the season to be jolly?..pssh..believe that to your folly!

Hey its that time of year again where the pretenders come out in force!


now that might sound a harsh comment to make but every year a vast majority of people put on this 'united front' and have this façade of im so happy, this is the season to be jolly etc. when in truth...THEY ARE AS MISERABLE AS ALWAYS AND EVEN WORSE IN SOME CASES!!!....
... as most know i work in sainsbury's in castle vale and deal with a range of customers from the local shoppers to the passers by to the snobbish shoppers who happen to turn up by chance and each and everyone one of them regardless of which one are as miserable as the next in this 'time to be joyful', its a crying shame that ONLY one time a year people feel the need to try and be hopeful, cheerful and serve others with goodwill and all yet to only seem to regret doing so or to consider it a favor to do so....things like that make me wonder how far have we fallen that we cant even be gracious to our brothers or considerate to our sisters ALL YEAR round never mind to struggle to do so for 1 month -or as some see it a week- in the year.
now i wont tar all people with the same brush as there are some people that regardless of the time of year display a cheery, mild mannered attitude to all folk they pass regardless and i personally would like more people to adopt this kind of nature... its just that i find it shameful that at even this joyful time of year where most of us get to spend time with loved ones we've not seen much over the year and being in each others presence as the ultimate 'pick me up!' 
but i guess some people are just miserable all year round and will remain so possibly for the rest of their lives no matter the occasion.


i wont rattle on much more for case of repetitiveness but i must at least 'hail up!' those who have shown an abundance of joy and 'Christmas' spirit on towards others, and every time I see or hear such acts I give them all praises as encouragement to maintain their cheerful demeanours.but for now im signing off so peace be with you and spread the joy around this Christmas as you never know, your smile may be the only smile someone may get! :)

....IM...GETTING...MAAAARRRRRIED!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!............................
.........................................................ok ok calm down chris....right down... *inhales-exhales-inhales-"wuuuuuuusahhhhh"* lol only joking im exaggerating ;D

well well well it had to happen some day so why not now?! seriously though this has singlehandedly been the most important decision of my life, to have had the priveledge to choose my life partner/comrade/friend/lover and to have found (get ready to hurl at the soppy part lol) the perfect woman for my self who just oozes class and to me is the and through her i know my life will be a

"living definition of beauty personified"

"living embodiment of friendship and love...!!!!"

well now that its been done we now have ALOT of planning and saving and sorting out to do and yes its already takng its toll but we will do this together and make it a day to remember and even moreso a life to live. so far we have the places planned regarding where we would like to have booked for the wedding and the reception and also our guest list for the meal part -unfortunetly we cant invite everyone through costs- but it shall be a joyeus occasion none-the-less right? ;)
as for now i shall leave this blog at the TO BE CONTINUED STAGE so this is not farewell but rather a see you later..... chris edwards signing out.......................................

Spare them the rod or get them a spare rod!?

     Now this piece is my first in months and im sorry I have slacked off so soon after just starting this blog, apology done now time to cut to the chase!


     'Spare the rod or get a spare rod' if you can't already guess is about one thing and one thing only... beating children. Now at the risk of sounding prehistoric I personally think that parents should be administering fair/just discipline to their children in cases of ill manners and misbehaviour. Now I get alot of people saying to me that I remind them of a military drill sergeant the way I can easily talk about disciplining any children I have. Now this goes far beyond the levels of giving them drills to do or press-ups etc -considers hmm-.. but from what I have viewed in my years on this planet, any cases where parents have neglected to make use of consistently disciplining their children they have ended up unruly, disrespectful, lazy, and shameful.


     To say I have been shocked at the manner in which some children have spoken to their parents! e.g "shut up", "get lost", "f*#% off" and they are just the tip of the ice berg. I mean if that was me back in the day the taste would have been promptly slapped out of my mouth and ALL fun activities would have been confiscated and banned with immediate effect. Now I hear parents counting to ten -leaving the child to misbehave up until 9.5- and I STILL don't understand how parents rely on that to control a childs behaviour for very long, yeah it may work in their toddler years but soon as they hit 7/8 they start figuring out that mommy or daddy won't do a thing until the full count is up, which in some cases I have saw doesn't matter anyway as for eg the child is told they will not be brought the icecream they wanted from the shop and that their 'punishment' is for them to have to wait until they get home to have one from the freezer there...?...!... "BUUURRRGHMMM?! what in the blue blazes kind of punishment is that? someone..anyone, school me please"


     I just think that this generations light hearted approach has been diluted such to the point discipline is no longer worried about and is just rather a laugh to children. But im telling you now and any of my children who may read this..."DADDY will drop two lick pon your gluteals if the occasion calls for it and I will feel no way..trust me on that!" just thinking about it makes me think to live next to a forest so I can bring renewed life to the old time saying "go cut yourself a switch" *hehe giggles to self*. All else I can say is without certain disciplinary measures being utilized I can not see how any child -especially in this day and age- can be brought up with the child willing to hold on to the values the parents have set out for them to uphold, I don't just mean beating them I mean grounding them or taking away their hobbys for a specific length of time be it their sport they play or video games they have or any parties they may wish to go to in future etc...    


     However not to back track I know I have to be careful about how I phrase I will discipline my children but I think it goes without saying that I would never just beat my children for the sake of it or to the point of severe brusing etc but I do hold a firm belief in the 'ritual' that is butt whoop! I understand times have changed and there are all these 'laws' that protect a child from certain types of punishments like beating borderlining on child abuse but as my BIBLE states in Proverbs 13:24 He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines diligently and punishes him early. So in agreement with the Holy Book I personally think that the best 'medicine' for a childs bad attitude and/or insubordination is a tanned backside...trust me, just look at how 'healthy' I am *shouts "thanks mom" in background whilst rubbing derriere* {0_o}

"More fish in the sea*"..what Lake are you fishing from?!

    Now, during a conversation with one of my closest friends- a certain Mr Lunnel Sterling Pile-Gray - it came to our collective attention that through the course of our life after many deliberations with our lady friends and/or acquaintances the 'majority' have fallen (or still in) the pit of 'i am not good enough so must alter this and that stage'. Now as harsh as that could be misinterpreted as,i have found it to be nothing less than true.
    There is a term often banded around that is  'there are more fish in the sea' to which i take is to help pump those pessimistic/hard done-by/hurt souls in order to drag tham out of their pit of doubts and insecurities etc. but with such an equivocal statement being banded around its leaves huge imprints on a persons mind i.e in this case the ladies. As i said before i have spoken to multitudes of women who have had bad relationships and then spouted out that phrase -unbeknownst to them subconsciously- blaming who they are for the demise of relations...*smh*
Ladies have then tended to go through efforts to change who they are or what they stand for i.e changing clothing style and shifting morals respectively e.t.c. neglecting to acknowledge that its just the same 'dead beat' guys they keep falling for that is the problem. Its then that the ambiguity of the title statement* falls into place...

    what it means is that by telling ladies that there are plenty more fish in the sea leads them to deduce that they are indeed in the fishing game but by bad luck and chance they have just caught the wrong fish (man),so, what do they do? (rhetorical)...they end up changing BAIT?!

    Now by BAIT i mean (CQ) "everything that has something to do with the lady in question and nothing to do with the guy who wasnt the answer" - which IS wrong -

    The term BAIT has been dubbed if you will by my friend Mr Pile-Gray in his own meaning,however through our collaborative thoughts i have come across a more defining acronym that is:

B-body
A-attitude
I-ideals
T-target area

    Body: meaning that alot of females will do their utmost to >fit< into what is deemed as socially acceptable... ladies will alter their hair, add make-up, add nails, change their attire, go on ridiculous diets i.e starvation! and even go to the extreme in some cases as having sergical enhancements!..now im not saying that a lady should not do any of these things -except the latter two of course! come on now {0_o}- but if you going to change your hair or your appearance do it for the right reasons and not in order to try snare yourself a man, as if it doesnt work out you will be kicking yourself that you done all that hard work to no avail.
    You should all be in a place of contentment in regards to your self being as we are all made from the eyes of the Lord, in HIS image. Just think, would you make something to have your best traits and then say its ugly..i wouldnt think so! as the Bible states "we are all fearfully and wonderfully made". So stop with the negative, pessimistic talks of "im not good enough or im not pretty enough" as i tell you this now.
outer beauty is fleeting ....(<).... inner beauty is everlasting!

    Attitude: is a key area in that it affects not only yourself but the people around you especially those that have known you over any long length of time. Some ladies have changed how they 'act' i.e talking with slang or attempting to be more 'thuggish/ghetto or more 'prim and proper' depending on the guy they are trying to attract. People then can say that you have changed or your switching etc then not only have you altered yourself, you have now lost your friends/family trust as they now view you as a different person who will dash them aside for a less important factor eg impressing/nabbing a guy. Dissing people in order to get or keep your man can only be seen as feigning ignorance through cantankerous blindness that will end up to your own folly, i have seen girls act in such a manner and believe me its not a pretty sight, also you run the risk of any truly self respecting man who potentially could have been a right match for you can be put off such persons..this in turn goes hand in hand with the next letter that being I which stands for....

    Ideals: an ideal is a principle or value that one actively pursues as a goal (or man in this scenario). many ladies have been brought up with certain morals by their parents/guardians as such as not drinking excessively, not being compulsive liars and the worst case scenarios not taking drugs or sleeping around!!
i have bore witness to countless ladies that have reduced themselves into nothing short of hopeless bordering on being hapless (yes, THAT bad). I mean there are females that have never taken a drink in their lives and yet have then gone on to not only start drinking to the point of near paralysis but also taking drugs aswel all to win the approval of a guy..WORDS CANNOT DESCRIBE MY DISGUST!..  to see, hear or know that there are ladies out there that do these things to themselves not thinking of the consequences of their actions that leaves me in deep sorrow..and thats not me being empathatic but rather sympathetic as i truly do yearn to help such souls who do those things but some (CQ) "remain so blind that they refuse to see the light". Then you get ladies that can end up lying to friends and family especially those still at home who persist to sneak out at early hours of the morning not aware that the guy is just trying to make them 'another notch on the belt' -is that what you want for yourselves?- which leads me to the final point of fornication (sex to those who dont know). I dont understand why so many would give up the one thing that when its gone can NEVER be re-claimed! (for those that know the Bible, yes God will forgive you and absolve you of all guilt through baptism.. but you physically wont get your virginity back). What is sad though is through the perception of the world sex is just a tool to have and indulge upon at any giving chance leading to lascivious trysts in..public TOILETS *smh* in rooms where other people are present etc where is the shame!?........
    Ladies are giving up their virginity to such scum and leaving the principles and morals their parents had set out for them to persue and keep.
sorry for the long speech but its all stuff that needs to be 'acknowledged' and moreso 'changed'. it seems long have gone the days of someone holding themselves for marriage as its socially acceptable (theres that term again) to sleep around. All i can say to this a the moment is ladies please i beseech you to not give away your innocence and trade your integrity for a measly one-night stand or to be someones 'link'. remember that you too could have daughters and im sure you wouldnt appreciate them behaving in such a manner! so cling to your morals and wear your priciples with pride. Especially as so many ladies also want to do so but just dont have the strength to break out of social standing so then conform to how the world actively suggests you to behave. So do it for your friends sake who may follow your influence, do it for your daughters who may follow your example, but more so, do it for yourself as through your ideals you know who you are..  so if you dont have any...who are you?!

the final letter is T that stands for

    Target Area: brings me to the end but its probably the most important thing of all! as even if you alter your appearance, change your attitude and compromise your ideals-not to ever suggest im agreeing with any of those-, what good would that do in your search for happyness if you are getting the same kind of man?! (not rhetorical, ask yourself this..yes..really!)


    The analogy is simple and such, "you can keep changing the BAIT in 'hope' of securing a bigger and better catch, but instead of changing the BAIT with every failed attempt or catch that didnt suffice, but ask yourself this...why instead are you not changing the LAKE you are fishing in?!"


    The explaination: ladies you need to realise that you can alter all the previously noted but if you are going to look for a different guy thats in the same walk of life as the previous then you never guess what you are going to get?...yeah the same 'dead beat' guy but different wrapper per say. It seems like a pretty easy concept to understand but you wouldnt imagine the amount of ladies who still put them selves through misery with this,i mean how hard can it be? take these scenarios e.g.. you get a guy in a night club whos a flirt and ends up cheating on you then you go back and do the same thing and get another guy whos a flirt -not to say all will do that, but why risk it?- or you could be with a guy who sells drugs, he gets put in jail and your left with a child by him with no dad then you get with another drug dealer and have another child...what do you envisage as possibly happening? why give yourself the mental torture and distress?
    Im not attempting to make anyone feel bad if they are stuck in such a situation as the scenarios above, but just to let them know that there is always a way to come out of the pitfalls in life and that you dont have to settle for less or remain in them for the rest of your life...so be aware of the guys that you seek!

    So in writing this blog i hope at the least awareness has been raised to the seriousness of Ladies who choose to change there BAIT for the attention or hope of ensnaring a man, your personal being is who you are and i myself believe that there truly is people that match us in the World but Ladies should definetly not compromise themselves in order to force through a relationship hastily.
    This i believe as all ladies should realise that they are beautiful manifestations of Gods will and that unfortunetely 'the world' will always fail to recognise such natural beauty. So now the question begs to be asked... are you truly satisfied with the Lake you are fishing in?

God Given 'Resolve'...Resolute Diamond

Sometimes we go through things in life that look so bleak that there is no light at the end of the tunnel,
There are times when the pressures of life seem to be to much to the point we feel like we cant take it no longer,
Then there are the times when we can fall into a pit of dispair to which we neither have the required tools or the 'man' power to be able to climb out.

Alas, some will never be able to emerge from said pit through the lack of belief in the strength given to them in Jesus name and the reluctance to get to know/meet with him...

Isaiah 40:31 - Those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.

I know any non-christians reading this could say its easy for me to write somthing like this as its my religion, but please lets not forget i to was peering in from the outside and thought through sheer luck the situations that threatened to tear me down diffused by 'human means'. i won't go into any long story here but feel free to ask and i will talk with you upon request and give you a personal testimony into the works that have been done for me.

I entitled this God given Resolve due to the fact there are issues and trials we go through we can by ourselves fail to conquer. However God proclaims he shall go before you and give you the strength to persevere amongst all seasons.

I draw similarities to a diamond one of the planets most precious and valuble commodities. We all wish to be like a 'diamond' however we shower ourselves in materialistic things in order to gain high monetary value n social status 'and what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul Matthew16:26'

We use such 'luxuries' in order to fool ourselves and others into believing we are past our problems but all we have done is put them to one side that fester and grow into an even greater problem, we need to allow God to help us get through and past these problems and make it through to the other side... for it is these such problems we face in life that end up empowering us and making us stronger right..
Lest we forget how is a diamond created...?

Tempered in the most humid of temperatures... the most hostile of environments.. even the most unbearable of pressures is what it takes to make a diamond.

 

So Seek God in your problems and see him guide you through them and you will soon see that the diamond you are striving to be, will arise from within you sooner rather than later.. 

Being 'real'

     This 1st topic is about a growing problem in society today. It is a misunderstanding of the difference of being 'honest/forthright' etc and bein...'real'.
I feel as though this world is growing into a place where its tasteful to be inconsiderate of peoples feelings and is shown in any actions/re-actions people take.

example:a person you know does something that vexes you. Then in retaliation you not only cuss them out (swearing included sometimes if not all the time), but you then go on to spread character damaging rumours about the episode tainting their reputation amongst peers etc... -quite commonplace-

     Now, whether you are 'religious' or not we all know that those actions are not the right way to go about things. People are displaying vindictive actions and passing themselves off as bein real in which they view as a means of saying what they want and doing what they want in order to exact their revenge, as people are now starting to accept this misconception of real as a form of upright behaviour.
     I have no idea why people 'need' to swear or partake in said actions but if you think that it is some way of releasing urself from your fraudulent feeling of indignation then you are severely mistaken.

     I recently had a similar issue raised when someone attempted to act out this 'new' meaning of real in my direction. Obviously the comments made were quite inappropriate and very rude while the excuse for the words told to me were that the person was being real and honest... i did remonstrate with the person in order to deduce the reasons behind their issue and that i found the comments to be dis-heartening etc.
     Gratefully the person understood that the comments were harmful and apologized but its sad to think that these situations crop up in the first place. Just how have we allowed this type of autocratic behaviour to slip into our speech and/or thought patterns?

     I do pray that people will try to act in a civilised manner whether they have been crossed or let down as we all fall short of expectations at some time in life, then in our own case want understanding and leniency to fall upon our feet...as for now.. all i know is i won't be partaking in any real actions myself as in this respect and meaning... in saying this i aim to remain as un-real as possible.